Taking risks

I hardly ever get a mani/pedi because it takes a good chunk of time, I always mess it up, the manicure usually chips within 3 days, and it costs $$$. Well, my lovely friend came to visit our hometown and suggested we get our nails done since her mom owns a nail salon. I'm usually pretty tame when it comes to painting my nails. I keep a solid color and sometimes switch it up by having one color for the hands and one color for the feet. I always look at the different nail colors for the seasons or new ways to do them, like texturizing with lace to create a crackling effect, but I never experiment myself. My friend Vivian decided to switch things up a bit. She painted her toenails with a hot red and one toe opaque white. My nail lady suggested I do the same after I had already decided to paint all my little piggies a seafoam blue. I decided to take a small risk and paint one toe with the same red Vivian used. Then, it came to decide the colors of my fingernails and I decided the red was a good complement. The nail lady suggested I paint one blue to match my toes. My answer: No. Here I am considering myself a risk taker, and I can't paint a nail blue. I work from home, it's summer, I never treat myself to a mani/pedi...I mean I seriously sat there for 10 minutes contemplating if I should paint my index finger blue. I have gone to CO without friends and made a living out there. I conquered (well somewhat) snowboarding, yet I couldn't take a stupid risk of having multicolored nails. Finally, I decided to take my small risk and my fingers and toes complement themselves in a fun way, not a scary way. No matter how big or small the risk is...changing your vanilla latte to a hazelnut latte or taking a job in a new city, I invite you to live life and take it! My nail risk might not have dire consequences or opportunities (though I did get offered a job that night--could have been my awesome nails!) , but if I took the safe route every time I wouldn't know the joy of not knowing where life really wants to take me.

When meeting a guy...

I'm going to share an intimate moment with my readers because I feel that when it comes to single people with alopecia, the thoughts of what the opposite sex thinks of our condition is a main issue for dating. Last weekend, I went to the Hang Out Fest in Gulf Shores, AL, which is a very sandy, beachy afair. My first night, I met a very attractive guy who I frankly thought was out of my league. Now hear me out, I know I should have all the confidence in the world and people will tell me I am beautiful no matter what and I am not lacking in male attention, but I do have my insecure moments. As the night wore on he kept playfully touching my head, and as a reaction I would pull away and after awhile, I either look like I'm high maintenance (very unlikely considering our surroundings of a music festival for 3 days) or I am hiding something. He asked if my hair was fake, and I said no in defense. I sometimes can handle these situations with finesse and say "yes and this is why and if you don't like it, leave," but this guy was really cute with an amazing body and I deverted into my turtle shell somewhat. I told him I wore wigs and because of alopecia and admitted I was self-concious about it. Some guys will clam up, which makes it awkward for me or ask questions, but I felt like he handled it well in just still acting interested in me and still wanting to kiss me later. Of course that is what we all want isn't it? While we were kissing later (in our own seclusion) he said he wanted me to take the wig off. My response? You can if you want, but I look weird. Basically priming him for "Hey I'm this freak with missing patches of hair without my wig, so here ya go and let's still lock lips." However, I took it off and he felt my hair and had nothing to say, but to keep kissing me and hold me. In fact, he told me I should have more confidence in myself.

This post my be a little detailed and confusing for some, but I wanted to walk through my emotions with my readers about how I felt I was treated when faced with a "wig situation" and a new guy. It comes to the point where do you tell them or don't you? How long do you wait to tell someone? Does a fleeting make out session warrant the truth? Whatever the answer is, and I've been in every possible scenario, don't beat yourself up for the hand you have been dealt and stand strong. He could have been an asshole and said nevermind, but that is like some guy not liking you because you are Jewish or have six fingers (which Anne Boleyn supposedly did and she seduced a king). I can't say the next time I won't flinch away or experience that sense of dread of telling my alopecia story to another guy, but it is nice to know that some guys out there really don't care about your hair :).

2 Steps forward, one step back

So my previous post mentioned how my hair was growing back and I could go without my wig. Sadly, this is not the case anymore. I am still able to go without my wig for a little longer, but I probably only have a couple of months left. Unfortunately, the condition has decided to attack my front hairline again, which is making it increasingly difficult to cover the large bald spots. While I wish my hair continued to grow without problems, dealing with the naturalness of my hair has been a battle all its own. It takes me an hour to make my hair resemble something of a decent style, and with Georgia humidity, I might as well give up all together. I'm not going to lie and say I even try every day. My unruly curls look awesome in a bun hidden away from the world. Even though I rather deal with a haystack on top of my head for hours on end rather than be submitted to a lifetime of embarrassment and stares, I have a new love for my wig each time I try to contain my wild child. Wigs for the most part always look perfect. Real hair ones you can style anyway you like and it will keep for a week. I actually make others jealous because I can change my hair on bad hair days. Good quality wigs are not by any means cheap (I get mine at Wigs by Cheyenne and Services in Destin, FL), but it probably adds up to what I would spend for a haircut, highlights, keratin treatment, etc. Living back in Georgia where the humidity zaps energy from everything doesn't even have power over my wig. Now if only I could control the sweating.

Media Expectations

The article I am posting is about a plus-sized model who has settled at a beautiful, healthy size 8. She previously suffered from anorexia as a model, and is now getting slack as a "too thin" plus-size model. Her answer to the backlash is how everyone should view the modeling world, and I applaud her courage to walk her own path. This is her story: http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20464449,00.html

Revitalash

Wow, has it been a while since I have posted. My hair is growing back in amazingly, and I am comfortable going out without my wig on! I still wear it, but it is a huge milestone to be back in that place where a wig or a hat aren't my only options.

So, I want to talk about a product meant for growing thicker eyelashes called Revitalash. A friend told me about Revitalash after reading some reviews about it concerning eyebrows as well. Being someone who has to draw on her own eyebrows every day I wanted to look into what the internet was saying about the stuff. There are many alopecia sufferers who do not have their eyebrows or eyelashes (I am lucky for this cycle to have kept my eyelashes for the most part), so hopefully this post will help.

This is how eyelash-growth.com described Revitalash:

"Revitalash Eyelash Conditioner belongs to Athena Cosmetics, Inc. an organization devoted to philanthropy by supporting the fight against breast cancer. The product was born out of a doctor’s need to offer his wife a solution for her once beautiful eyelashes left sparse and fragile due to intensive chemotherapy treatments on her way to recovering from breast cancer.

It claims to provide longer, fuller, and thicker lashes anywhere between 3 to 10 weeks, which is a long wait indeed. It is to be applied by a brush applicator only once a day at bedtime to the base of the lashes to boost the beauty of the natural lashes."

Not only does it promise growth, but also supports the fight against breast cancer; a cause I can definitely stand behind. However, every new product has some side effects and the ones for Revitalash should not be taken lightly, like changing eye color. The price is also pretty steep.

****I want to know if anyone has used any of the lash growth products on their eyelashes and/or eyebrows and what their experience has been with it.

Coloring the world one wig at a time

Many people who have to wear wigs will wear them proudly...one long one day, purple the next. I have not quite gotten to that point where I can let acquaintances (think concierge or coworkers) of my daily life see me differently day to day. When I went blonde for the summer it was a huge change for those who knew me, and now that I am back to my former brown, those who met me as a blonde find it a huge change. Again most people would like the attention of a new haircut, but I only feel awkward as people asked questions of where I got it done and if my roots were starting to show.

However, I now own a short brunette wig and a red one (my next color of choice). I am no where used to having short hair (short hair as a child was traumatizing) to being a redhead. One Saturday night as I contemplated how new friends should see me as because I knew they could care less what hair was on my head, I switched back and forth between the short do, the red, and finally settling in my comfort zone with the wig I have been wearing for a few weeks now. Still I got the "Wow you went dark!" comments since they had not seen me with it yet. Why could I not break free of this fear though? After all I had been at Lake Powell with a large group who barely knew me and did not put my wig or hat on once. I hate that I psyched myself out of the other wigs because I did not think others would find me as attractive or accept me for my medical issue. I've never had a problem with people being understanding once I told them, but I have this deep seeded fear that I will be judged for lacking the beautiful flowing hair as my peers. Funnily enough, the wigs are easier to tame than my own crazy curls, but I would give anything to deal with the unruliness on my head than spend a lifetime hiding under hair that isn't truly mine.

The View

The View covered the story about Miss Delaware and her alopecia condition. Though it wasn't so much about alopecia as it was about bald women in general. A lot of people who have alopecia are extremely offended by how the women disregard alopecia and instead talk about the shapes of bald heads. In my opinion, I was not offended because it seemed more off topic than about alopecia women, though it would have been nice for them to explain more about the condition and expand on the struggles we go through.

What are your thoughts?

Video: http://www.alopeciaworld.com/video/video/show?id=2022678:Video:450109&xgs=1&xg_source=msg_share_video